I have gone on two probably unnecessary spiels lately, but I JUST HAVE A LOT OF FEELINGS OKAY.
The more interesting one, I think, was a response to TWORS, which I have never really properly done, so I figured it was about time for me to expel my feelings in the form of capslocks.
I absolutely hated this episode the first time I saw it. I was so, so angry - at River, at the Doctor, at Moffat. The Doctor was such an asshole, and River was so...for lack of a better word, pathetic. It wasn't romantic like Rory's 2000 year sacrifice was; it was selfish and annoying and I was a bit blindsided by how horrible the Doctor was being to her. I just wanted to jump through my screen and smack them both.
Then I rewatched it again, and again, and again and again and now I don't think I could love this scene anymore if sprouted wings and had furry adorable offspring.
Because it's just so them. It's perfect. River disrupts all of time and space to make a point, and the Doctor still doesn't believe he's worth it. My favorite part about it is that he actually listens to her. Her whole speech. He tries to interrupt but he can't, and he just listens and the look on his face is just heartbreaking. And he just keeps denying it, keeps ignoring what she's trying to say, and she just won't give up.
"I can't let you die--"
"River, I have to die."
"Shut up! I can't let you die, without knowing you are loved. By so many and so much, and by no one more than me."
And then! Then, I just sort of realized this and I kind of love it, akljawlker, she keeps subtly asking him if he has a way out. If he's found a solution. When they're in the crypt and he says that there isn't another way, her answer is, "I didn't say there was, sweetie." which is basically her saying, I haven't figured this out. Please, please tell me you have.
And when she answers "Yes" to his question,
"Billions upon billions will suffer and die."
"I'll suffer. If I have to kill you."
"More than any living thing in the universe?"
she's asking him again if he found a way out. "If" she has to kill him. Not "when." "If." She's begging him to tell her if there's another choice, and in the same moment she's telling him that she'll do anything - anything - to help him.
Even MORE than that, and this just breaks my little wibbly heart, she's finally putting her love for him in terms he can understand: pain. He doesn't understand how much she cares about him, but he'll understand how much she'll hurt if he's gone.
And that's when he stops fighting her. When he finally stops lying to her. Everything he's said up to this point:
"I don't want to marry you."
"You embarrass me."
"Your daughter! I hope you're both proud."
"You just can't get good psychopaths these days."
"Because as long as I'm alive, time is dying because of you, River."
"Oh, you love me, do you? Oh, that's sweet of you, isn't that sweet, come here you."
-which, by the way, I still want to punch him for - falls under Rule 1: The Doctor lies. He's trying to push her away, to make her angry enough to restart time; he's trying to convince her that he doesn't care so that she'll stop caring. And it doesn't work. It couldn't possibly work because it's River and she loves him and she's clever enough to know how to prove it.
She's strong enough to pull apart time. She's brilliant enough to break through it. And she's strong enough to kill him if it's the only way. But most of all, she knows him enough, loves him enough to break though those walls and make him see his own value. By this point, how could he not love her?
So he tells her. He tells her his secret. He could have told them all - Amy and Rory, too - but he didn't. He told River. Not so that she'd kill him - I've said before, I firmly believe she'd have done that anyway - but so that she wouldn't be in pain. So he marries her. And imo, even more than that, he asks for her help. He doesn't tell her to do anything, he asks her to help him. He never asks for help, ever.
And my favorite bit is, by telling her his secret, it means he can't hide from her once Time is restarted. He has to see her. You bet your ass she'd hunt him down if he tried to avoid her. So by telling her, she becomes the one person he absolutely cannot walk away from. And I don't think he wants to. He definitely doesn't want to.
TL;DR: AND THEN THEY HAVE LOTS OF TIME BABIES AND SAVE THE UNIVERSE AND PISS OFF SONTARANS AND ARE EPIC FOREVER AND EVER THE END.
And if you're still reading, A) I'm impressed! and B) here's the other rant, in response to this picture.
This makes me so angry. I get that some people don't like River for one reason or another, but stop trying to devalue her character and stop trying to devalue what she means to the Doctor. I don't particularly like Rose, but I appreciate her role as the Doctor's companion, everything she did for him, and how he felt about her in return. Why she gets so much love and River gets so much hate for doing nearly the same thing is beyond me.
And plus, she's a Time Lady. There's finally someone out there in the universe who can at least somewhat comprehend what he's been through, who can at least somewhat see Time the way he does, who is nearly as brilliant as him and can keep up with him; finally, there's someone other than a deranged lunatic out there that's like him, and god, can't we at least agree River's beautiful for that? He's not alone.
And I just... ugh. I have so many ~feelings about all this and I'm definitely not trying to attack the person who submitted this but this confession just really sets me off because goddamnit, she deserves to know his name. She fucking deserves it. Even if she's not his wife. Even if he doesn't love her as much as she loves him. She paused all of time and space to make absolutely sure that before he died, the Doctor knew how she felt, and how the universe felt. She did what Rose did, except instead of doing it for herself she did it for him. I'm thoroughly convinced that Tesselecta or no, she'd have killed him if that's what he wanted. She'd have restarted time - she's the one who brought him to the Pyramid in the first place; she could have easily kept away from him, but she didn't. She thought he was going to die and the last thing she wanted to do was make sure he knew he was loved.
So yeah. TL;DR: She better fucking know his name, because if this story line winds up being River sacrificing everything for the Doctor, and him giving her next to nothing in return, I am going to be one seriously angry bucket of fangirl.
BASICALLY I JUST LOVE RIVER SONG WITH ALL THE POWER OF AN EXPLODING TARDIS AND PROBABLY MORE AND IF SHE DOESN'T GET LOTS OF SCREENTIME IN SERIES SEVEN I AM GOING TO SMACK A BITCH.